So I'm not quite sure what I've chosen to write for this but I feel like I need to.

I'm Calix. I'm Female To Male Transgender.

I never thought of how many people I would loose when I came out. My own father didn't talk to me for months. My parents are just pretending that I'm still their little girl. I'm not. I'm a man. I'll always be a man. I've been a man this entire time. Even though I'm too scared to go out in public that doesn't change a thing. I'm graduating highschool in two months. And leaving my femininity behind. I'll be free. It's all that's keeping me from spiraling back into depression. Apart from my friends and significant other's support. I know they will always love and care for me. I know this is inconsistent and I cut out all the abuse and the four times in 2016 I've been jumped and beaten but really. The bad times don't matter. What matters is the good times. Like when I was called male for the first time. Or when I met another transgender male outside of the Internet. When he helped me out my first binder on. The first time I've heard "You're just one of the guys." All the memories that make me happy. Things are getting better. There's more days where I can go to class feeling like masculinity is radiating off of me. There will be so many more bad days but I have hope the good days will outnumber the bad.